The trees. I remember the trees. Waving like a friend across the street. The park I would go to. Escaping from the world like a convict. My escape would always be short. Just an hour to get away. But really it was just so my thoughts could flood my mind. “You are alone”, the words I hear so often to myself. Always playing the “What if” game where I think, “What if I could have been a better friend?” I hate these games but like every addict, I can’t help but indulge in them. But it was another day to go, and escape. I approach my favorite spot in the park. A lonely bench looking over a cliffside. Below the cliff, the city I live in. A city filled with so many familiar unknown faces.
I sit on the bench, and pull out my phone. I just hope to get a text, a call, a friend, someone to just say something to me. But my notifications are empty. Some escape this is. I continued to look at my phone as if my glance would conjure a friendly message.
Beside me, an old man sits. I guess while stuck looking at my phone I never noticed him approaching and sit next to me on this now less lonely bench. “Beautiful day.” He says, “What keeps your head in that phone?” I look over at the old man. His hair is a clean snow-white color, and he wears a leather flight jacket. The jacket is worn, and well loved. I glance at him with an annoyed and indifferent glair. I had hoped that if I gave him the annoyed glair that maybe he would go away. I turned my head back to my phone, and continued to wait. “It’s about someone isn’t it? Maybe… Someones? I can tell.” I looked up at my phone, and tried my best to get him to go away. In the most snarky, and annoyed tone I could muster I say, “Do I know you?” he nods his head up, and smiles. He looks out to the cliffside, and says “Nah, no you don’t. Not many do.” He looks out, and continues to smile. “Than what about you mind your own business, and go away.” I say like a child not getting their way. The old mans smile fades, and continued to look out. “You say that, but what we both know is that really, you wanna talk. So lets talk.” I begin to become frustrated at this nosey old man, and confused as to why he’s acting like he knows me. I’ve never seen this old man before, and somehow he talked as if we are old friends. “What do you even know what I’m going through?” I ask. “Well, I know what you are feeling. You feel like you’ve been travelling with someone for so long. Then they decide they don’t wanna continue with you. And because of that, you feel lost.” I become increasingly confused, and my “annoyed” act disappears. This old man knows a lot more about me than I expected. My mind floods with questions, and at this point all I want is to know more about this old man. “Who are you-“ I mutter but get cut off by the old man, who at this point is now facing me. He takes off the glasses from his face, and uses them as a sort of pointing tool. “I am somebody, nobody knows. But that shouldn’t be the question you should be asking yourself right now.” He says. I think for a minute. Confused, and my heart began to fill with emotions. I give in… “Fine…” I say, “What do I do next?” I feel shamed for not knowing the answer to my own question, but my mind continued to play that cursed game of “What if”, and I feel lost. I looked into the old mans eyes hoping that this stranger would somehow have the answers for me. “Well, boy. There’s thing you can do.” The old man said, his smile appearing again, “You know. There are people out there who say friends just fade in, and out of your life. That it’s just a part of life. But that just isn’t true.” His smile vanishes again, and his face becomes stern again as he continued, “People leave you. They decide you are not worth their time. Now that, is life.” The flood gates in my brain began to drown my mind with thoughts. Remembering all those who claimed to be my “friend”. All those who left me. I begin to see their faces. They go in, and out like a poorly made slideshow. Wishing that the list of names of those who left me, wasn’t so large. “But boy, when you find those people. The ones who will jump you the first second that things go south… Don’t hang onto them... All they are going to do for you is bring you more disappointment.” He continued. I looked down, back at my phone. Still empty without a word from anyone. I looked back to the old man. He looked at me with his bright blue eyes with care. His seriousness is matched with his compassion for me, a stranger. “But its just not that easy.” I mutter, “People always seem like they care. Its not that easy just to let go of them.” The old man puts his glasses back on, and looks back out to the cliffside. “I understand that its not that easy. But in the end. You will feel stronger with the people who stay. Stronger with the ones who really care.” I looked down, and this time not at my phone. But at the stone pathway that the lonely bench stands on. My eyes focused on every rock, but my mind was thinking about the strange conversion. “Do those people even exist?” I ask with a quiet tone. “They do, they’re out there.” He says, as he looks at me once more. His cheeks began to rise slightly, and he gives me a half smile filled with care, and continues, “But you wont ever find them looking down. And you dang sure wont ever find them hanging out with people who don’t care.” I looked back up at the old man, and back down to my phone. I took a moment to think, and realize what I needed to do next. I put my phone back in my pocket, and looked out to the cliffside. The sun was falling, and it wont be much longer till the moon rises. I looked back at the old man, but I become surprised when I see. No one is there. The other side of the bench where the old man was sitting is empty. With shock, I got up, and looked around. He is nowhere to be seen. My mind calms, and the flood settles. The only thought I have now is, who was he? But that thought is soon altered to the message he had given me. I turned to the cliffside one more time, and looked over the city. I turned around, and continued to walk down the path to leave the park. To leave the bench.
Written by Jonah Stone
Edited by Marie Osmola